There is a saying, ‘change is the only constant in this world’ – humans are always changing, every moment we are in the process of change. Cells are dying and new ones are being born in our physical bodies and our world. The awareness of the fact that we can chose a new way of being in each changing moment or chose the same old pattern, is what made me pay attention. I hadn’t thought of that being a choice; now I do. We decide.
Part of my choice to change -I created a couple of new short videos to showcase some new art -Here’s one link . This is another -certain paintings seems to be following patterns and so I’ve created ‘collections’ of like expressions. It’s a bit like organizing a sock drawer only more fun!
Last evening, I was looking at a painting as I poured my paint on the canvas and noticed what a mess of potential it is before it defines itself. I laughed and realized how symbolic of life painting has become for me.
I’ve lost friends because I am not who they thought I was, or perhaps I’m just a new version that they never saw before. Or perhaps they are not as they were before? Like the paint in the bottles before it dances across the canvas, I too am not just one form. The label says one thing, the poured out contents reveal something else and when it mixes with the other fluids again we have another expression. I am the contents of the container and the expression on the canvas-almost never am I the label people have given me!
I am very different when my environment is different and seemingly predictable when it is familiar, perhaps. Like a chameleon I have many shades and hues. Not everyone will like a certain shade or hue and that’s just fine. There is a saying, ‘people come into our lives for a reason, a season and rarely a lifetime’, this I have found to be true. The challenge is in knowing when to let go. Nothing is wrong when we move on. We are simply taking different paths than our friends or family. They aren’t wrong and neither are we. It is life. I notice that in these changing times we are met with a lot of hard rules about what is right or wrong. We are facing a real challenge to either conform or stand alone and I think that’s part of our primitive indoctrination. Without the tribe we would die thousands of years ago.
Today we still require connection but I’m not so sure we absolutely need approval. What I’m aware of is the importance of allowing people to be who they truly are, even if that means following a group because they don’t trust themselves to go it alone. It is a process and sometimes we need that group very much, other times we need to know we can trust ourselves and go it alone. The one aspect of this time that I do not appreciate is the shaming people for whatever life choice they are making. Shame is a big part of our collective history; likely the one tool that has been used in all cultures to control and manipulate. We do it in families and on the global stage. From what I can determine shame is counter evolution, it’s destructive and it does nothing to contribute to a healthy society.
This year has been different for me. Life has changed, as I mentioned in my previous post, ‘I’m not the same person who planted those seeds years ago’. I’ve grown so much and the dreams I planted and held in secret didn’t always bloom. Now new seeds have germinated and are beginning to bloom. My healing path has been ongoing for about 20 years, some of it physical and a lot of it was emotional and spiritual. The results of that healing, or one could say the fruit, has been my ability to share my art and soul with you without fear.
I’m both giddy in my joy as my art expands and the many paintings reveal different parts of my imagination and I’m feeling all the anxiety of a new mother holding her newborn for the first time. I had no intentions of selling my art when I started this adventure. The encouragement of those who saw various pieces and loved them, is what drew me into the arena. It was not their ‘approval’ that I found encouraging, it was and is their excitement and their response to the art itself.
Offering my art to the world to purchase, to invest in, to bring my imagination into their world, is a big step and it is a little overwhelming at times. Every step of this process has challenged me in new ways. It is not simply about finding the money to buy the art supplies (until paintings really start selling), or set up a website, considering an art show, but learning the concepts of business behind selling my art and learning the tricks and tools of paint on canvas as well. This is an entirely new world for me and it happened so naturally-I am in awe of the Universe’s hand at play!
Letting go of old friends and old ways of being in the world can be easier than I had thought in the past. When the path is clear and the pull is strong, there really doesn’t seem to be another choice.
When you reach a fork in your path, remember that either path is going to be an adventure and you’ll never really know which one held more treasure, you just have to trust.
My soul sings a new song today as I skip, jump and sometimes crawl along this new path! I send you happy vibrations for your path too!
Catherine
